Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
