why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
