No more Irish car bombs ever.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
