I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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