She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I just forgot I was standing up.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
