i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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