I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
