i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
