my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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