Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
