no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
