need another drink. this is the easiest way
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Can Purell be used as lube?
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Randomize
