I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
