how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize
