She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
