Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
