I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
