Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
