even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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