We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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