I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
