She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
