Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
