Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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