I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
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