yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
