Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Randomize
