Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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