He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
