Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
