The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
