they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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