At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
