Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
He did a backflip because drugs
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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