no, he came in my armpit
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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