so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
