Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
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