very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
