please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
