I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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