It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize