And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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