yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize