So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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