somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
