Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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