Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
im having a threesome with these popsicles
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize