she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
