just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
