The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize